Dealing with change in our industry

A coaching client of mine asked me recently "Khai, I'm having a hard time dealing with the changes in the mortgage industry.  Things have been so different over the past few years.  It's difficult, not fair and I'm worried that we might even be out of jobs soon and then I'll have to find a new career.  Do you ever feel like this and if so, how do you handle it?"

I thought about it for a second and then responded "You know, when I think about it, my life has always been about change and I never thought they were fair:

• I remember dealing with the change of having a new baby sister and why it wasn't fair I couldn't have my own room anymore.
• I remember dealing with the change of going from elementary school to middle/high school and how it wasn't fair that some of my friends could stay out later than me.
• I remember dealing with the change of turning into a responsible young adult and thinking it wasn't fair when I didn't get into certain colleges even though I worked hard and had good grades.
• I remember dealing with the change of my parents divorce and thinking that it wasn't fair my sister and I couldn't live with both of them anymore.
• I remember dealing with the change of moving to a new city and why it wasn't fair because I hated the new one.
• I remember dealing with the change of graduating college, getting a real job and how it wasn't fair the IRS took a big portion of my paycheck.
• I remember dealing with the change of being married and why it wasn't fair my wife had a say in everything I spent from now on.
• I remember dealing with the change of my career in technology, when that industry crashed and I thought it wasn't fair I had to get a job in the mortgage industry and learn new skills to support us.
• I remember dealing with the change of getting older and why it wasn't fair I didn't have a lot of energy anymore and why I couldn't eat all I wanted anymore.
• I remember dealing with the change of having kids and why it wasn't fair I couldn't sleep well anymore and why I couldn't go out freely anymore without finding a sitter I could trust.
• I remember dealing with the change of having to take my kids to school and why it wasn't fair that I have to worry about picking them up at 3p in the middle of the workday or pay expensive after school care fees.
• I recently, I am dealing with the change in the mortgage industry and why all the new regulation isn't fair to those that have been honest hard workers.

There's many changes in life and we never think they're fair.  For me, the two biggest changes I've had to deal with in my life are my parents getting divorced and having kids.  How do the changes in the mortgage industry and its fairness compare to that?  Not even close!  If there is another change in my life, so be it because that's how my life has been anyways and I've adapted each time just fine.  Life is about change, without it, you'd be dead.  And many people think dying isn't fair..."

"You know" he said, "I never thought about it that way.  I've had just as many changes in my life and I've dealt with them fine.  Thanks, I feel better."

Comments

[Laura Roderick]

There is nothing "fair" about "fair"...it's all about compromise & adaptation. Once we embrace this, the pit-party is over & we can sober up & move forward. Great article, thanks for sharing!

[Air force ones]

Fair is ordinary,but in fact there are so many things seem unfair,so we must try our best to persuie the true,so first ,we can build the relation each,we are fair,after all I am.